Thursday, August 26, 2010

Result of Boredom



It's still dark out as I sit here in my dim lit bed chamber. My beloved is away for the meantime. I wait for him to return. I'm unfortunately basking in the boredom of this quietness. Fearing that my boredom will turn to madness. It's ironic that I usually wish to be left alone, now that I am, it's so boring. I suppose it's this yearning to go out more .... not to mingle, but to go to the local bookstores, drink tea and enjoy the surrounding. *Sighs* So many books, so little time. There's absolutely nothing to do at this hour & I have no wanting to turn on the television.
A cold front will be coming very soon and I cannot wait for it. I've had enough of this grueling weather. The heat has almost been unbearable. It's time for the fall to come through and how it longs to come through. I'm almost impatient about the weather. Fall is my favorite time of the year, when it's so beautiful out. *Sighs* Sadly, I've nothing further to write at the moment. Til next time. Cheers!

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Dreamscape

A long day has ended
The world rest in slumber
For the sun has descended

Dream state has commenced
Drifting farther into
Another plain of existance

How ever long it takes
For the body to heal
Time is nothing in Dreamscape
As the world awaits

Vermilion Reminiscence


Cries in the dark
Echo through time
In a blood soaked land
They've left their mark

Torture unimaginable
The pain endured
For a fetish unspeakable
A nepharious task administered

Locked away in darkness
Exile was the solution
Punishment for the blood countess
With no chance of absolution
A heart too tainted & black
May those ancient walls
Hold her back

The number of victims is uncertain
Enough to paint the skies red
They no longer suffer the burden
Along with the maidens
The tyrant is dead

A tale too gruesome
It must be fantasy
In another time & place
It was reality

The Music Behind The Magic

As a note to all whom come upon and read my work, which I hope all can enjoy for leisure purposes. I am a music lover, like most people. Music influences me and it is clear in all my work. From a sketch that I might do, a possible painting, or a composition, there is sure a musical note behind the making of it. I will list some various artists and some links that are available to access such music. Two songs I know are rare and can be access through youtube on random videos. My choice in music varies within the rock, industrial, and goth genre. Here is the list of songs and I hope you can enjoy them as well as my work. I will include the links of some.

The music behind all of the work so far ;

1. Nine Inch Nails - "Terrible Lie"
2. David Bowie - "Heart's Filthy Lesson"
3. David Bowie - "I'm Afraid of Americans"
4. Type O Negative - "Are You Afraid?"
5. Machines of Loving Grace - "If I Should Explode"
6. Depeche Mode - "Black Celebration"
7. Depeche Mode - "Blue Dress"
8. Depeche Mode - "The Things You Said"
9. Dave Gahan - "Saw Something"
10. Sisters of Mercy - "Flood II"
11. Behind the Scenes - "Free"
12. Behind the Scenes - "Human"
13. Bjork - "Venus As A Boy"
14. Tori Amos - "Liquid Diamonds"
15. Einsturzende Neubauten - "Die Interimsliebenden"
16. Project Pitchfork - "Time Killer"
17. The Smiths - "How Soon Is Now"
18. Stabbing Westward - "Why"
19. Stabbing Westward - "Sleep"
20. Stabbing Westward - "Violent Mood Swings"
21. Medicine - "Time Baby 3"
22. Lestat - "?" <--- hard to find (will give link)
23. Carcrash International - "Last Remains" <--- hard to find (will give link)

Here are the extra links ;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=joOJ-0e2cTA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nufIYi_WYF0&playnext=1&videos=MeYf9d1GCX8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJ_tj3C61V0

*** Carcrash International 's "Last Remains" is available on a gothic compilation cd called "In Goth Daze" (available through Amazon.com)
*** Lestat's "?" is available on a gothic compilation cd called "Goth Box" (available through Amazon.com)

For A Love Lost

A friend become a stranger
A companion turned foe
What happened between us
We may not know
It was never meant to be
I should have known better
It was clear to see
He was not meant for me

How foolish I could be
The reality was plain to see
My heart screamed his name
I should have known
For what I did
Can lead to shame

Time has lessened
I have progressed
From the event of a love lost
It was a valuable lesson

Obsidian Attraction


Walking out in a winter cold night
Passing the streets, cemetary, and to the park
The night felt right
Buy some time to think
that place was a good start
The cold was bitter, but inviting
Sitting amongst the trees in this lonely place
This pass time had been enticing
Nature has its way of helping with clarity
From the nothings to the significance
Nature helped with organizing and serenity
Thoughts had flourished
The mind kept wondering
Finally stopped to take a look around
And admire the surrounding
Alone at last
Give a sigh
A place not bothered by anyone
For the most part, nor I
Wait! There were footsteps in the distance
Quite an interruption
Distraught from the disturbance
Perhaps a passerby
Eyes fell to the ground
Listen to the sound
Give another sigh
There was no one around
Alone at last
The footsteps had passed
Finally, no sound of foreign
Not wanting to hear them again
Thoughts drifted into fantasy
Dream of joy, peace, and ecstasy
A face unfamiliar
Appears in the mind's eye
A magnificent visage
Did imagination apply?
Such an impressive mirage
Look to the night sky
Taken back by the stars and the obsidian beauty
Get the mind off of the lie
Admire the bright moon
It wouldn't be long
Must depart soon
Stand up and walk the path of the trees
Explored many gardcns and botanicals
No beauty compared to these
They held their own spectacle
Footsteps followed along the path
Startled, momentum ceased to a halt
A stalker? A lunatic seeking wrath?
Whatever the case, was not ones fault
Gained the courage
To turn around
Annoyed and enraged
Nothing in sight
Not even a sound
It was dangerous at night
Common hooligans ran about
There was nothing in sight
To give a fright
Spared the time to get out
Continued on the way
When a disturbance filled the air
Curiosity lead one to stay
Turned around and....
'He' was there
Shocked by 'the face' in plain sight
What manner of trickery?
The odds on this very night
The same face that projected in the mind
Stood tall and ten feet away
Not a single word that one could find
To beckon the stranger to go away
Momentarily lost in the eyes of the stranger
Stunned by this man's feature
Entranced without thought of danger
In awe of this creature
There was no man this desirable in this land
An idea or realization conquered the senses
This was no ordinary man
A feeling of excitement and panic for an instance
An overwhelming anxiety took over
As much as one wanted to stay with the stranger
A voice in the mind begged to go
'He did not move as one commenced to walk
It was peculiar that he did not mutter a sound
Nor bothered to talk
Fear ceased and an awkward wanting
For this man to stalk
Turned from a yard away
Mysteriously the man disappeared
Ghost, angel, devil, or some other cosmic being
How one desired him to reappear
Who was the man with extraordinary eyes
The one with starlite hair down to his chest
The one who can entice and hypnotize
Cease time and mystify the rest
Home was sanctuary
Alone, away from society
Down by the cemetary
Relief to be back in the castle
And ponder over the incident
Without the public hassle
How one desired to know that man
A strange visitor in the outskirts
Of this wasteland
A sip of chardonnay
Will subside the intensity
And melt the worries away
Look out the window
And what does one see
The strange man
Standing by the oak tree
Down there... staring up at the window!
Staring into one's eyes
Alarmed and almost bashful
For one's true feelings
Could not hide
Finish the chardonnay
Head down the stairs to the door
What this stranger wanted
Not quite sure
Felicity ; one can offer copious
For this alluring creature
One would be very generous
If he were dangerous
There was no safety
And not another soul about
There was one way to investigate
Just open the door
And find out

Friday, August 6, 2010

Dangerous Obsession

What lay before me
Was not yet forseen
The unexpected change
Didn't give the time to arrange

Though the transformation was pleasant
It didn't adjust to the present
Caught between two tide ropes
Had to hold on to one
Grasped onto hope
Watch which one had won

In the end there were pleasantries
Life full of levity
There was solemnity
While another drew tension
Within the gravity

Witnessed the cumbersome fight
Too involved in the burdensome plight
Who was there to blame?
Oneself?
The other tortured soul without self?
The tortured soul who wants a lover
The one who can't fathom
That it is over

Night Terror


The storm had passed
Still there was no power
Hoping that it wouldn't last
The power would return at any hour

The air was silent
Not a sound stirred
Suddenly a bang so violent
Someone must have heard

Footsteps filled the hallway
A whisper broke the hollow
It almost sounded far away
No choice, but to follow

Candle light was my illuminescent
With eyes so sensitive
The light seemed irridescent

Arriving to the main chamber
Swore I saw someone or something move
Could this mean possible danger?
This I could not prove

There was a knock on the door
The sound alarmed me
Wondering who could be at my door
This was no time to panic or cower
I had to know
Who could it be at this hour

I opened my door
I found nothing
Confused and pondering
What could have caused the knocking

Then my eyes fixed to the ground
There was an unusual brightness
all around
I took a few steps forward into the light
It was the moon that burned so bright

I stood in awe of the moon
Admiring lady luna's beauty
The day light would arrive soon
Shame to miss her shine so heavenly

Yet something was wrong
Not quite right
The markings on the moon
Were a horrible sight

There upon her surface
Lay a skeletal mask
Astonished I must confess
Frozen still, moving was quite a task

Finally, I managed to run inside
I bolted the door
I didn't want to see
That skull anymore
Once again there was a strange feeling
I was not alone in the main chamber
This made me feel uneasy

I could feel that I had guests
Not one - but guests!
It felt as if I were a hostess
The feeling was unnerving nonetheless

I turned around to face my intruders
I expected the worst
They could be muggers, rapists, or murderers
Unprotected and out numbered
My mind calculated
What could happen first

I faced my unwelcomed committee
Nothing could prepare me for this
I would have preferred a prison escapee
If I survived, this night will not be missed

My eyes must have been playing tricks on me
This impossibility can not be
For there were six shadows sitting strangely
In my chamber
Yet these strangers sat
Imposing no danger
I became very agitated by their intrusion
I stepped forward with candle in hand
To try and disprove this shadowy illusion

Disappointed that I had nothing, but a candle
To penetrate the darkness
It made the situation seem hopeless
With the area illuminated
I expected to reveal the assailant's identity
I stood now, but four feet from them
Still they were all masses of darkness
Which made the condition dreadful in it's entirety

I began to tremble
The candlestick mimicking my movement
Wondering why they had assembled
They did not move nor make a sound
Not a detail revealed within their darkness
Not a strand of hair
Nor their feet on the ground

All positioned strangely amongst my furniture
Sitting, kneeling, crouching, awkwardly
Why? I was not sure
They were different in shape and size
These features they could not disguise

I obviously did not need to grab their attention
I manage to ask what was their intention
I did not receive an answer.
My agitation and fear grew heavy
With this possible danger

I commanded them to reveal their identities
Threatened them with the authorities
Still my demands were not met
Were they toying with me?
Were they going to kill me?
Apparently not yet

Then the largest of the group extended his hand
He beckoned me to come closer
I refused his command
His voice broke the silence
Deep and demanding
Still it provoked violence

I stepped backwards
Never took my eyes off of them
Still the large one demanded me to move forward
A sudden realization hit me
Fear took over
I could not stop shivering

Dreadful knowledge that hit me
Was a strange epiphany
The thought was quite random
Of the identity of these phantoms
A thought of myself dreaming
As I ran screaming
Would be a great salvation
From this hellish confrontation

I did not look back
For fear that they would be at my back
Instinctively I ran to my bed chamber
Escaping a possible attack
And potential danger

Power was out
The lan line wasn't working
I found my cell phone
Still shaking uncontrollably
For I was utterly alone

The blasted cell did not work
What could I do?
Things had gotten worse
The bloody phone was dead
No options and desperate
Weakened, I fell on my bed

Once again it was silent
Not a stir
Nothing violent
Had the phantoms gone away?
Hoping that they would not stay

Minutes passed as I lay in bed
Recalling the incident
Images ran through my head
It could have been worse
Grateful that I was not dead
Peace and serenity took over
As I rested my head

The dreadful feeling returned
I looked about the place
Relieved that the candle still burned
Still distress was upon my face

Unexplained, something blew out the candle
At once, I began to panic
For this I could not handle

I arose quickly
To re - light the candle rapidly
My breath grew heavy
It was difficult to make it steady

Nothing happened as I froze in contemplation
Still confused and trying to make sense of the situation
Then suddenly an invisible hand
Grabbed my arm
Clearly with intention to harm
Shocked, for a sound I could not muster
Dragged on the floor
Their speed grew faster

Pain was inflicted
I was in deep agony
My thoughts were conflicted
As I suffered this misery
They bit at my flesh & pulled at my hair
My only hope was to survive to the end
Or wake from this nightmare

Stygian Metamorphosis




Long ago, there was once a boy
Who was timid
This young man, tall and solid
Lacked real joy

Time passed and the young man transformed
A pauper turned prince
He was well formed
All who looked upon him could not resist
I was a close companion and bare witnessed

Soft spoken and very seductive
Joy, happiness, love, and popularity
A life so productive
The prince had it all
Then one day
He had an atrocious fall

Time passed once again
The prince had vanished
No one knew of his whereabouts
The prince was finished

Time had taken a toll on the prince
Again he had changed
A darkness had enveloped him
And the prince became derranged

I saw the prince recently
I could not believe my eyes
The prince had become a beast
It couldn't be, must be a lie

Fair to Darkness
Cleanliness to Filth
Warmth to Cold
Tenderness to Stone...

Time had stolen decades from the prince
Hair matted with filth
Eyes sunken with black rings
Had the prince filled his heart with guilt?
He now was not fit to be amongst kings

The cause of his transition is a mystery
It's truly a sad tale
For we had so much history
It is clear
The prince lives in misery
He chooses to walk alone
For whatever reason
The truth will be unknown

Love's Amber

Searched far and wide
For my lover's eyes
For truth be within them
And nothing to hide

I searched in eyes of dark oak
For desire they truly awoke
Darkness was their true talent
For they had a tendency to provoke

So I searched in the eyes of the sky
To whom I did abide
As tender as they could be
They had a taste to lie

I found the eyes in a sea of green
At first they seem serene
As I ventured deeper
They became obscene

I thought the journey was over
In search for a true lover
I thought I saw it all
There was no more land to cover

When I stumbled upon the eyes of amber
My heart skipped and I swore
I heard thunder
The amber glows like fire
To my amazement
They are immense with desire
The amber is as sweet as honey
To my astonishment
They wished for matrimony

So the search had ended
I have found my lover
Though the expedition had finished
The journey is not over

Affliction

Darkness begins to fade
My body starts to wake
As the strength has failed me
Conscience begins to evade

Thoughts are a wonder
Yet it has blundered
Can't seem to grasp
What must be asked

It's too late now
To stop this cycle
The question is how
To hasten this trial

My eyes cannot see
My legs are not limber
It has come to this finale
My body desires slumber

My tongue craves wine
My heart longs for touch
I have no time
And there isn't much

The day bids goodbye
The affliction is ending
The muster a soft sigh
For I am mending

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

The Random and Unclear

The morning was a beautiful enlightenment with a cool breeze. The sun had not risen when I opened my eyes. The mist in the atmosphere outside danced among the trees. The scenery was romantic to behold, but I knew it wasn't going to last long. The blazing heat would take form and ruin it. I took it all in while I still could and was surprised to find my beloved beside me awaken. We both absorbed the dark sky and cool air. Minutes passed and the heat progressed slowly. The sultry days are dreadful and almost unbearable. As the gloomth of the morning diminished, so did I. On normal circumstances, I'm quite energetic than this. Yet today I've grown weak. As this day has progressed, so has my lack of enthusiasm unfortunately. My beloved commented that he felt the same way. I suppose it's one of those days and it will pass.

Life has seem quite interesting lately. To my surprise, I've been bumping into familair people. People I have not seen in over a decade. So many familiar faces, it's overwhelmingly nostalgic. Lately, I'm running into people almost every week, some pleasing, some quite the opposite. They all remind me of travelling back to a time forgotten. Things I've forgotten ; didn't care for. Nothing terrible ever occurred, just youthful insignificance. Yet, things changed and it was very good to see most of them again. Still, my life goes unchanged nonetheless.

As for me, life is interesting and colorful. Always something interesting occurring. Speaking of interesting...here is a little something to research for fun. If one likes to read about 'the unexplained' or the paranormal, this would interest you. I like to amuse myself by reading subjects of the paranormal. I like the entertain myself with these kinds of readings at night before bedtime. I was reading this entry in one of my paranormal books the other night and it was about an occurrance or an entity ( if you will) called a "Vardogr." It was very interesting and one might find it entertaining as well. I would recommend reading about it if this sort thing amuses you. If so, do enjoy. Until then, I'll close this entry and submit more work at a later time. Also, I will be submitting my art work as well, not to mention random photos.

Cheers!